I used to work in Dolores, In a hardware store

By Rob Carrigan, robcarrigan1@gmail.com

"I Used to Work in Chicago" is a drinking song. I have adapted it to fit my own circumstances, and 'regionalized' for my own narrative. It follows below.
Years ago, my good friend Jeff used to "bring up the house" with his guitar and this little ditty in the oldest bar in Fort Collins, when it was still a 3.2 beer only place.
The song was written by songwriter and entertainer Larry Vincent. The earliest printed date for the song is March 1945 in the underground mimeographed songbook Songs of the Century, however versions of the song circulated "on the street" as early as 1938 according to the Digital Tradition Folk Music Database. Many of the lyrics are considered humorous because of the oblique sexual references. The song is often chanted by various British university sports teams, often Rugby teams.
After World War II, there were various versions of this song commercially recorded (e.g. by Spike Jones).

• A variation of this song is also occasionally performed by Eddie Vedder of Pearl Jam during their live performances with the final lines, "Liquor she wanted / Lick her I did / I don't work there anymore."
• The same (Liquor/Lick her) version is also sung by Dusty and Lefty, played by Woody Harrelson and John C. Reilly, in the film A Prairie Home Companion.
• One verse sung by Charles Durning in the movie Jerry and Tom. "A woman came in for a house dress. I asked her what kind she wore. 'Jumper,' she said. Jump her I did and I don't work there anymore."

From USED TO WORK IN CHICAGO

(Traditional)

Three Bits Of Rhythm - 1946
Also recorded by: Merle Travis; Oscar Brand;
Rick Bedrosian; Sammy Kaye & His Orch. 

Adapted by Rob Carrigan, regional emphasis.

 We used to work in Dolores
In a hardware store
We worked in the candy department
We did, but we don't anymore
A lady came in for some candy
"And what will you have?" we said
"Kisses" she said, and kisses she got
We'll never work there anymore

SPOKEN: And then we got fired

I used to work in Dolores
In a hardware store (You did?)
I worked in the hat dept
I did, but I don't anymore (What happened?)
A lady came in for a hat one day
"What'll you have?" I said (What'd she say?)
"Felt," she said, and felt 'er I did
I'll never work there anymore

SPOKEN:
1st Voice: That was my Wife!
2nd Voice: She's all right
1st Voice: I'm not talkin' to you
2nd Voice: I'm not askin' you
1st Voice: Ooh!

I used to work in Dolores
In a hardware store
I worked in the glove department
I did, but I don't anymore
A lady came in for some gloves one day
"And what will you have?" I said (What she say?)
"Rubber" she said, and rub 'er I did
I'll never work there anymore

SPOKEN:
1st Voice: I love my work
2nd Voice: I bet you do

I used to work in Dolores
In a hardware store
I worked in the shoe department
I did, but I don't anymore
A lady came in for some shoes one day
"What kind would you like?" I said
"Boot" she said, and boot 'er I did
I'll never work there anymore

SPOKEN:
1st Voice: You get a kick out the work, don't you?
2nd Voice: Well, you see, that was my mother-in-law

I used to work in Dolores
In a department store
I worked in the stockings department
I did, but I don't anymore
A lady came in for some stockings
"And what'll you have?" I said
"Hose" she said, and hose she got
I'll never work there anymore

SPOKEN:
1st Voice: You're fired!
2nd Voice: You can't fire him, he means Nylons
1st Voice: Ooh!

I used to work in Dolores
In a hardware store
I worked in the bakery department
I did, but I don't anymore (Make any dough, Joe?)
A lady came in for some bakeries
"And what will you have?" I said
"A layer" she said, a layer she got
I'll never work there anymore

SPOKEN: I love my work

I used to work in Dolores
In a hardware store
I worked in the poultry department
I did, but I don't anymore
A lady came in for some poultry one day
"And what will you have?" I said
"A goose" she said, and a goose she got
I'll never work there anymore

We used to work in Dolores
In a hardware store
We worked in the meat department
We did, but we don't anymore
A lady came in for some meat one day
"And what will you have?" we said
"Baloney", she said, and wieners she got
We'll never work there anymore

Photo Information;

Hollywood gathering years ago. Photos courtesy of Scott Weinmaster.

Legend of the Hollywood

Don’t know which side I came down on that night.  For the forces of evil, or good. But that is how it all got started, I guess.  Yes, the legend of the Hollywood.

By Rob Carrigan, robcarrigan1@gmail.com

Been in a lot of bars my friend, pursuit has taken up much of my life.

Many a swinging door should’ve passed. Some trouble saying ‘no.’  Just ask my wife.

There is the Buckhorn and Bee, Wolf Hotel, St. George, Antlers and Zekes.

Millwood, Diamond Bell, Wynkoops, Town Pump, The Snort, and  Sally’s Peak.

Been in the “Face Bar,” Bull and Bear, Green Frog, The Mayor, and Humpy’s.

Last Dollar Inn, Rick’s, Stumbling Monks, Toronado, Bomb Shelter,  and Gilly’s.

Bangers,  Ebeneezer‘s, Hofbrau,  Holy Grale, Rustic, Purple Pig and McSorley’s.

But down near the river and back off of 145, was the start of them all, my friends.

The first cut is the deepest, that's where this old boy began his wayward life.

If you looked down street then, Taylors,  Akin Merc and old Tade’s.

Dropped off stacks at the long counter, rounded edges, big mirror, where history was made.

The Rose brothers were in there that day, and Johnson, and old Blue.

Watermelon, and Don Wallace, Manuel, Roelicker, One of the Grubs, and Shag, too.

Spec Dillard, Tommy Rowell,  John McEwen and a Randall (off to the side shootin’ pool.)

Juke box in corner still blarin’ as Ellis and the band not quite ready, sipped coffee from a cup.

Celebration in town tonight, if all goes as planned, Dolores was likely to liquor it up.

It was Escalante Day I assume, and all-class reunion, I am afraid.

The place was full of loggers, a cowboy and miner or two, folks from the forest, and those never worked.

Dam builders, hippies, tourists too, several housewives (who, because of a husband) had been irked.

Out in the street an arm wrestling contest was just about to get underway.

Chain saws buzzin’, fire trucks yelped, and those that could still see, watched the parade.

Football players recalled moments of fame, I was on the same team, but remember just a jerk.

And then in the bar, all hell broke loose. Music playing, sounded great --  part of neighborhood.

Took my first drink, laser Jim Beam, Wild Turkey or some concoction -- paralyzed, right where I stood.

“Please allow me to introduce myself,” said the fellow nearby. “I’m  man of wealth and fame.”

And I, the last devil in Dolores, had sympathy for him. In fact, I recognized him by his first name.

Don’t know which side I came down on that night.  For the forces of evil, or good.

But that is how it all got started, I guess.  Yes, the legend of the Hollywood.

###

Hollywood Bar "the morning after." Photo by Sam Green, Cortez Journal.